The Return?

Ok, another date, another try, another fail. The hard drive appears dead. It does not appear to be getting power. So far, my search online for "externl drive does not light up" and "no LED light on Seagate external drive" and "beeping external drive" with and without "Seagate" or "seagate Slim" and more searches on the Seagate site and on Google produce no inormation that explains what the drive is doing... or isn't doing, in this case. The USB Controller? The disk mechanism itself? Something else? Maybe more searching will explain it, but for now, I am accepting death and loss because it appears I must. Will anyone come out to mourn with me?

Meanwhile, a wonderful nap after eating after work, waking moments ago for the bathroom run and a steay body-shower (no soap and no water above the neck, but almost as hot as it goes here and that is at least 120, but more likely somewhere between 140 and 160). Wonderful feeling. Awake, alert, and eyes clear and focused (so blurriness is fatigue much more than eye failure, which is excellent news). No sleep last night, softball rained out, fell asleep right after dinner around 6PM. Dinner was once again high calorie, leftover wings and meatballs with chocolate ad ice cream. 196 lbs clothed before dinner. Bad me, good feeling, yummy taste.

Who cares?

I do. I also love the stimulation of eating meats and ice cream and chocolate now and then. Too many now and thens in the last few week, yes, but the sub-1000 calorie days will start any day now. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe when the chocolate and meats and fried frozen foods so easy to prepare after working 9-10 hours is no longer in the house. Will power has waned considerable in the past month or so. Allowing too much roommate's influence is not helping at all. His diet is mostly subs and frozen fried foods. Love 'em too much but gotta leave 'em sometimes. Veggies and fish, shrimp, some soups... that's yummy too.

Chocolate sits right next to me at the moment. It says the sweetest things. I feel so loved.

Whoppers, a milk chocolate bar, creme filled chocolate chip cookies, two different chocolate icings, ice cream cones, fudge shell topping, so many choices, such wonderful chemicals, what a feeling (there's a song in there, but it may not be coming on just yet lol).

500 ml water instead, for the moment, and the bloated feeling holds off the chocolate, for the moment. That's 16.9 ounces, in case you are lost in translation. I don't remember that movie. I should watch it while it is on my mind. It must be on one of the four streaming channels we get. Not tonight though, I really should get in bed and let sleep return. Another sleepless night, in spite of the wonderful 5-ish hour nap, would not be wise with the workload I have scheduled this week. Clarity is important when preparing minutes and reports and running meetings.

A wonderful nap makes for a wonderful life, but a full 8+ hours sleep helps a dull boy not be so dull. Mixing metaphors, or something like that. Hey, this is what I used to do, remember? I mean blogging, free-associative in-the-moment writing. Do you miss me?

I do.

Narf :)