Immense & Intense

Immense, I say. Intense too. The weight of the world, that's immense and intense. Changes can be immense and intense too. Love can be, especially when it comes close and it shared unconditionally. Unconditional hasn't been close to me for a long time, but it is still both immense and intense inside of me. Jackson wrote tonight again. She is keeping in touch by email. I am not sure how much is for me and how much is for her, but it means a lot and I know it is both. She is insisting on paying for my new phone which is an intense and immense change. Finally. I never stopped believing. I waned, but hung on deep inside. Immense and intense feeling. Meanwhile, the lazy lingering malaise is immense and intense too. I got a teensy weensy glimpse of how much so after 30 minutes on the elliptical at 5.5 miles per hour. Pulse up to 126. Minimal panting, quick recovery (under 100 bpm in less than 2 minutes). Softball was rained out, so instead of feeling sorry for myself and indulging in food, I drove straight to the gym for the first time. Decent, but not completely functioning equipment, but free. Please do it again. I can accept the weight of the world when someone loves me. When I know I can love and be loved outside of my head. That is the most immense and intense of all.

But life, life is immense and intense too.

Narf :)